The BBC has reported Tony Nicklinson has died just a week removed from his failed effort to convince a British High Court to allow a person to give him a lethal prescription. I have followed the stories about Nicklinson who was "locked in" after a stroke in 2005. He was very clear he considered his life a living nightmare and that he wanted to die. I found Nicklinson's comments about his life and suffering distasteful. I also believed his words were destructive to people with a disability as they reinforced the antiquated idea that death was preferable to life with a disability. What I found hard to fathom was Nicklinson's contention that his life was a living nightmare never changed. He was consistently miserable and believed his suffering was singularly unique. Yet Nicklinson was in many ways lucky. He had a wife who was supportive and two children that clearly loved their father. He did not go into bankrupt paying for care. He was able to communicate even though it was a tedious process. I am not dismissing the fact being locked in is extra-ordinarily difficult. I am merely pointing out that Nicklinson was not singularly unique. In fact the only thing that made him unusual was his consistent misery. And the media loves miserable people with a disability. Pity stories abound and a man like Nicklinson provides great visuals. Pity the poor man pictured with his wife and children. No mainstream media outlets write about all the other people with comparable conditions that move on with life--and this is exactly what the vast majority of people with a disability do. We move on, adapt and lead ordinary lives. This does not sell newspapers. This does not make people cry. This does not make people thank God they can walk and talk and do not have a disability. This line of reasoning is maddening. And this is exactly why I have refrained from writing about Nicklinson. He pronouncements about his life being a living nightmare simply made me mad. Apparently I am not alone. This morning I read "Self Pity is Still Not Lethal! On Tony Nicklinson" written by Miss Dennis Queen (was Claire Lewis). See http://missdennisqueen.livejournal.com/49897.html She wrote:
Know what it isn't easy for some of us crips. To sympathise, I mean - Tony's attitude is quite offensive.I am tired of the pitiful debates. I am exasperated with this dishonest man who admits denying himself a better life but blames it on his body. I agree Tony needs to see his doctor - not for a lethal injection, for some anti depression support and a kick up the proverbial about how life can get much better if he puts down his fear and self loathing and lets it go.Come on Tony! Give life a go - almost all of the rest of us manage without suicide. Try living before you throw your life away dude!
I was thrilled when I read the words above. Miss Dennis Queen has been one of the most eloquent and pointed observers on disability rights and assisted suicide in Britain for quite some time. Once done illustrating how far off base Nicklinson was Miss Dennis Queen went on to state "The reasons for 'helping' disabled people to kill themselves are flawed and rooted in prejudice, internalised oppression, lack of independent living and scare mongering / fear about the future". At issue is not a bodily deficit regardless how severe or mild it may be. At issue is the social response such a body prompts. Thus I do not in any way want society to "help" me. I especially do not want any assistance with my death. I simply want to be equal--I want others to respect my life. I want people in this country to enforce the ADA with rigor-- a law that is not about architecture but rather the civil rights of people with a disability. In short, screw pity. Let's reframe the discussion to what is is really all about--civil rights.