Let me start by saying thank you for all the kind words, support, and suggestions. Today was a mix of emotions, news and procedures. As to the good, I found a used clinitron bed I can purchase. It will arrive next Thursday so I can get home. I am simply going mad here in the hospital. It is a fine instituion, the care quite good but far from ideal. This is in no way a complaint rather hospitals are dangerous uncomfortable places to stay. As for the baad, my small wound on my left side was debrided. In other words I had bed side surgery. The wound is deep, much dead tissue was removed. Just writing this brings me to tears. I had hoped, was in denial maybe, it was superficial. So here I lay with not one but two major wounds.
If I have done anything right it is to torture myself with how: how did this happen. My answer is as unrevealing as it is hopeless--I have no idea. This more than any aspect of my care haunts me. Measures have already been put in place to insure I will never be in this situation again.
Finally, the good. I am blessed with a great family. The support I get is overwhellming and deeply moving. I am not good company but I do appreciate all that my family does. Sometimes I just need to be alone, work through things by myself. I hope they understand thIs. I guess I am trying to confess I have been cranky and upset in the extreme. This is going to be a tough road and return to normalcy--one that has barely begun. I also know my crankiness will carry me far--it always has when times are hard.